"I thought you were korean because you are so beautiful."
When I was in kindergarten, I was placed into an ESL (English as a Second Language) class at my elementary school, despite having been born in the United States and raised here my entire life. That day after school, as I innocently shuffled my feet in the corner of the principal’s office, my furious Chinese mother demanded that I be placed in a “normal” classroom. But her heavily accented English was not the best help for my case.
For the rest of my life, I was trapped between two worlds, either being “too Asian” or “not Asian enough.” Admittedly, I was flattered whenever people begged to be with me in group projects since I was the “smart Asian.” But no matter how flattered I was, I usually never lived up to those stressful expectations.
As a result, I tried to break the mold, rejecting my “Asian-ness” as I grew older. It wasn't until high school when I finally came to terms with being Chinese-American. I started embracing my roots and explored my family history, and for the first time, I felt proud to be Chinese.
When I came to Emory, however, most people began asking me if I was Korean. Everyone jokes that Emory is full of Koreans. And Jews. (Obviously, I was mistaken more for a Korean than a Jew.) "Are you Korean?" replaced the "What are you?" question, as more people began to realize how offensive the latter question was.
I usually just smiled, shook my head, and said, "No. I'm Chinese. 我会讲普通话。"
Sometimes I slipped in a "sorry" in there, but then I would mentally smack myself. Why was I sorry for being Chinese?
One day, as I was waiting at the bus stop for my ride to work, a friendly looking guy walked up to me and asked if I was Korean. I smiled and gave him my usual answer.
"Nope, I'm Chinese."
"Oh," he said, and smiled back flirtatiously. "Sorry, I thought you were Korean because you are so beautiful."
I had to do a double-take.
"W-What?!"
First of all, I know that there is stigma associated with Koreans and plastic surgery, and how they all look the same because of it. And here's a double standard I would like to point out: ever think that white people who get plastic surgery all look the same too?
Second - does this kid, who was trying so hard to flirt with me (and failing miserably), believe that in order to be beautiful, I have to be Korean? Do people think Chinese people are not pretty? Does everyone think I'm Korean because they think I'm pretty?
I did a little more research. Apparently, people believe that Asians have plastic surgery in order to look more white. More evidence here.
But when white people get a tan, it's not because they want to become... Latino. And when white people get plastic surgery, it's because they want to have better self-esteem. But according to this article, when Asians get plastic surgery, it's so they can be more white.
Why is whiteness the standard of beauty?!!
Double standards suck.
As a result, I tried to break the mold, rejecting my “Asian-ness” as I grew older. It wasn't until high school when I finally came to terms with being Chinese-American. I started embracing my roots and explored my family history, and for the first time, I felt proud to be Chinese.
When I came to Emory, however, most people began asking me if I was Korean. Everyone jokes that Emory is full of Koreans. And Jews. (Obviously, I was mistaken more for a Korean than a Jew.) "Are you Korean?" replaced the "What are you?" question, as more people began to realize how offensive the latter question was.
I usually just smiled, shook my head, and said, "No. I'm Chinese. 我会讲普通话。"
Sometimes I slipped in a "sorry" in there, but then I would mentally smack myself. Why was I sorry for being Chinese?
One day, as I was waiting at the bus stop for my ride to work, a friendly looking guy walked up to me and asked if I was Korean. I smiled and gave him my usual answer.
"Nope, I'm Chinese."
"Oh," he said, and smiled back flirtatiously. "Sorry, I thought you were Korean because you are so beautiful."
I had to do a double-take.
"W-What?!"
First of all, I know that there is stigma associated with Koreans and plastic surgery, and how they all look the same because of it. And here's a double standard I would like to point out: ever think that white people who get plastic surgery all look the same too?
Second - does this kid, who was trying so hard to flirt with me (and failing miserably), believe that in order to be beautiful, I have to be Korean? Do people think Chinese people are not pretty? Does everyone think I'm Korean because they think I'm pretty?
I did a little more research. Apparently, people believe that Asians have plastic surgery in order to look more white. More evidence here.
But when white people get a tan, it's not because they want to become... Latino. And when white people get plastic surgery, it's because they want to have better self-esteem. But according to this article, when Asians get plastic surgery, it's so they can be more white.
Why is whiteness the standard of beauty?!!
Double standards suck.